Today I understood the meaning of life

It happened in the afternoon when I was returning with my stepfather from a trip I wish I didn’t have to mention, but I will in the spirit of honesty in my writing. We went to court to submit papers related to an eviction situation. But our financial challenges have nothing to do with what I’m about to describe. I’m just setting the scene! I was driving. We were moving slowly in heavy traffic on I-5 South, driving from Santa Ana towards Irvine.

I’d had a busy day — multiple work calls in the morning, then taking care of the unpleasant situation I mentioned above. I was tired but not fatigued. I experience different kinds of ‘tired.’ Sometimes I get so tired that I need an immediate nap. Today wasn’t that kind of tired. My mind was clear. The problems in my life, the hastiness of life, the heavy traffic, the early summer heat that could be felt today — I was aware of all these things, but I wasn’t bothered.

My mind was clear. Extremely clear.

In fact, my sense of consciousness was so clear and expanded that I can’t fully describe it.

The clarity was of the sharpest and brightest kind. I felt like I could feel the billions of cells in my head, and it was a pleasant feeling. They were working but not overworking. There wasn’t a single faulty one. They were all doing their job — connecting, igniting, generating energy, and helping me experience what I was experiencing — a very heightened sense of self-awareness.