This is how I resolved the mental storm in my head related to a rough stretch in my marriage.

The last few months have not been easy for my family. No self-pity and it’s nothing my wife and I hadn’t been through before in our almost twenty-five years together, but the degree of challenges we are facing feels higher than usual. On the topic of challenges, I am embarrassed to admit that I underestimated the extraordinary challenge of raising four kids. I thought it’d all be fun, notwithstanding disrupted sleep and dealing with many diapers when they are young. But it’s not just diapers. Each life is like a standalone universe, and as a parent, I am responsible for trying to keep these universes in order, all the stars in them and the black holes. On this topic, I was really touched by this video by Jordan Peterson (sorry, not-sorry, if you don’t like him)

Find Meaning in Life Through Responsibility

So we’ve been going through challenges. Unresolved challenges lead to tension. Tension leads to finger-pointing. Finger-pointing undermines the foundation of our union — love and respect for each other.

What’s not helping is that we’ve spent quite a bit of time apart in the last two years — again, all because of our kids. They are growing up, and their athletic and academic pursuits require special…