On love and 20+ years together

My partner and I have been together for 22 years. We met randomly, teenagers, with no one and nothing connecting us, but the magic of the universe.

There was a painful period of a long-distance relationship, but we’ve truly been together from the moment we met. We’ve spent more than half of our lives with each other. Our love gave life to four amazing kids.

My parents were married for 20 years but split up and it was ugly. So I am wary of claiming to have secured the “everlasting love”. As a couple, as a family, we’ve been through many difficult periods. There were definitely moments when I asked myself: Is there love still? Are we losing it? Have we lost it? I’m almost certain my dear wife had similar doubts.

But we are together, after two decades, and, without any doubt, we’ve experienced love, true love.

So a few thoughts.

Love is a blessing, a grace, a mystery. In some ways, it’s worrying. You don’t control finding love. It just happens. You accidentally find someone who’s easy to be with, who you like, who likes you. Through luck. I don’t know why or how I deserved it. What if you’re unlucky?

True love waits. It’s a song by Radiohead, one of my favorite bands. I was young when I found my love, so it sounds preposterous to talk about “waiting” but wait I did, in my own young ways. Or maybe I just had to mention Radiohead.

Love is not hard work. Not all. It’s easy. If it’s not easy, then maybe “it” is…