My number #1 parenting rule. It’s very simple.

I’m far from considering myself a great parent (of my four kids!). I’m undisciplined. I’m often lazy. Homeschooling my kids for example has been a disaster. It wasn’t some strategic decision — to homeschool them, but it worked out that way in the last couple of years. First, the pandemic kept them away from school. Then there were other disruptions. We moved across the country in the middle of the year for example. Also, my daughter plays a lot of tennis, and homeschooling gives a lot of flexibility for training and travel. I’m providing the context but the point is the same — I’ve been struggling to support my kids in their studies.

Arguably (according to my wife!), I have other weaknesses in how I parent. I’m way too soft. I am, truly. I avoid exercising authority over my kids because I myself, as an adult, reject authority. Reject with passion and conviction I should say. Maybe I owe this mindset to my parents. They were in opposition to the Soviet regime when its collapse was impossible to imagine, notwithstanding Gorbachev’s perestroika. But I don’t want though to analyze the beginnings and the development of my character. The point is that I want my kids to grow up always aware of their freedom, and mistrustful of anyone who tries to exercise power over them.

But I know that there are some qualities that make me a good parent, that make up for my weaknesses.

Here’s the main one. It’s super simple. I listen to my kids, no matter their age, no matter the circumstances.